So it’s been a little while since I last blogged and I can’t believe how fast this year is racing by. Easter is nearly here and I’ll be helping at the Holiday Bible Club at our church and then my family is off to Spring Harvest. (A Christian holiday at Butlins).
I love Spring Harvest! It has been something that I have attended since a young age and it is great we can take our little boy to be part of a fun few days of worship, teaching, fellowship and some time by the beach. I find it refreshing to go to events like this, especially as a worship leader, so that I can get refreshed. It’s easy to spend a lot of time giving out and being in the front line of attack that we forget to spend some time receiving. I love being immersed in Christian teaching and uplifting music and encouragement so that when we go back I feel ready and renewed, inspired and encouraged to go back into our church and serve and to be excited at what God is and can do.
I have loved being busy with recording, music and the concert recently. Singing and song writing is so much part of who I am and I am writing a lot of songs at the moment. This definitely comes and goes like the seasons, so I am enjoying this musically and creatively fruitful time. The recording is nearly finished – we have the last session tomorrow where the men from our church choir are adding some vocals for the song ‘Out of the Ashes’. I wanted a congregational feel on this song especially during the a capella section. I wanted an extra dimension for some of the songs so was able to call on my friend and talented saxophonist, Serge and my Dad who is a brilliant cellist. They both came in to lay down some great parts for some of the quieter songs. I got very emotional hearing these emotive and beautiful instruments weave there lines into the words and music that I had written. Once this last session is over, the mixing, mastering and finalizing album cover stuff starts. We are hoping to release the album by the end of April but will confirm a release date asap.
So life may be crazy busy but something that I have found really helpful in life is the importance of knowing and being comfortable in your own skin. It is so easy to be crippled by insecurities and fears that you are not good enough or won’t be accepted as you are. There is a deep peace that comes from accepting who you are in Christ and being able to rest in that. Whilst on a Worship Academy course a few years ago, there was a session run by an amazing man who had a very unique gifting. He was a classical conductor and knew music intimately. When he met people he saw them as instruments and could hear their ‘melody’. I remember him talking about how he saw some of the people. He suddenly stopped in front of me and started to describe how he heard me. Now as a singer I was hoping he would say a singer or a lead instrument, but I hadn’t actually realised that he was talking about the melody of the person’s life not what they were good at playing. He said I was a trombone. A trombone! It was only when he explained, it hit me between the eyes. Like a trombone, there could be long rests in the music, but then there would be amazing solos where I would have the most amazing melody – he talked about how a trombone slips and slides into notes with style and pizzazz and how that is like me.
I have never been someone who seems to fit in neatly into a group or a crowd. I struggle to do things exactly, precisely, neatly or the way people may expect or want me to. These words reminded me that I may not be conventional but that I am unique and that is just fine. Hearing this was such a gift and I started to accept who I was and that I was fine the way I was, unique and precious to God and that he had made me the way I was for a reason.
It was then that I began to value the gifting that He had given me and enjoy them and try to use them for Him, with peace and confidence. But it also helped me understand the way I work and to be aware of the areas I need to develop and improve and how to weather bad days. Having a confidence and peace in who God made me and who I can be has been an amazing thing for me – and has given me a new strength. I want to encourage you not to fight who you are – but to turn your eyes upon Jesus – to rejoice in the gifting he has given you – ask him for strength in the areas of weakness and to know most importantly that you are precious and loved.
‘How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!’ 1 John 3v1
Have a great week. God bless,